Last Tuesday we opened up a little bit about ourselves in this post about the real $herdog (yes, I’m still holding out hope that the nickname catches on) and John’s J-Boom version. The response was amazing: more than 1,200 supportive, funny, and encouraging comments, plus dozens of emails asking how we handle criticism and negative comments. That prompted this post.
By sharing our quirks, we encouraged readers to open up about their struggles. Many of the emails came from small bloggers who suddenly found themselves in the spotlight—pinned on Pinterest or featured on a bigger site—and then they got that one mean comment that stung.
With more readers comes more feedback—both positive and negative. I’m happy to be that overly enthusiastic cheerleader saying “you can do it!” and “reach for the stars!”, so here’s my advice in brief:
- It’s your blog.
- Be who you are. That is enough.
- Give positive feedback as much weight as the negative.
- Do everything with love.
They might sound corny, but those four rules have helped us handle the “I’m anonymous, so I’ll tell you exactly how I feel” phenomenon. Over the years we’ve heard all kinds of feedback, often contradictory:
- I’m not interested in posts about _____, so skip them
- Do more little projects
- Do more big projects; small ones are filler
- I want more Clara and Burger and everyday life
- I want less Clara and Burger and everyday life
- That paint color/art/room is ugly
- Stop using certain words because they make me cringe
- Stop being so cheap and spend money
- Stop spending so much money and be more frugal
- Move faster, I’m bored
- Move slower so I can catch up
- I’m disappointed in this choice/this idea/you
- This blog used to be better because _________
- I will no longer read this blog because ________
See the contradictions? If you tried to follow every suggestion, you’d have nothing left that felt like yours. After 2,000+ posts and more than four years of blogging, we’ve learned that some readers will love what others hate. That’s okay. The important thing is remembering who the blog belongs to.
Tip #1: It’s your blog. A blog isn’t a big magazine staff trying to please the largest possible audience. By definition it’s your outlet: write what you want, share what matters to you, and do it at your own pace in your own voice. If you try to appease every commenter, you risk losing the reason you started the blog in the first place. Trust yourself—your voice should be the loudest and your choices the ones that count.
For us it’s simply two people sharing home projects, family life, and whatever seems interesting. That honest approach is what brought readers in. If pleasing everyone becomes your goal, the blog stops being yours and it’s impossible to keep up sustainably.
Tip #2: Be who you are. That is enough. It’s easy to fall into “wanting more.” Readers want the next episode, the thicker magazine, the never-ending box of Oreos. That’s human nature. But trying to constantly outdo yourself risks exhaustion and burnout. You can’t control every reaction, but you can control how you create.
Blog at a pace that preserves your joy and inspiration. Quality over frantic quantity will keep you healthier and more enthusiastic long-term. If sharing photos or details about your kids makes you uncomfortable, share only as much as you’re comfortable with. If something feels wrong or draining, don’t do it. Protect your boundaries and your family, and remember: the blog should enrich your life, not deplete it.
Tip #3: Give the good feedback as much weight as the bad. Most of us get far more positive responses than negative ones, but a single cutting comment can linger. Do the math: if 99 people praise your work and one criticizes it, you still have a 99% success rate. Focus on the majority who support you. If you genuinely like something, keep doing it—this is your blog, after all. Let the positive feedback fuel you and don’t let one negative voice derail your progress.
Tip #4: Do everything with love. This one might sound cheesy, but it matters. Responding to mean comments with more venom doesn’t help. Try to approach negativity with compassion. Maybe the commenter is having a terrible day or is dealing with something painful. Responding calmly or with humor keeps you from getting dragged into an argument and often ends the interaction on a better note. Being kind is something worth modeling and passing on.
That’s my brain dump. I hope it helps anyone feeling overwhelmed by attention or criticism as their audience grows. For us, the blog is about sharing our experiences and helping readers with tutorials, tips, and behind-the-scenes glimpses. We’re always touched by the kindness and enthusiasm our readers show—so touched that writing the Thank You section of our book made me cry. Your support has been life-changing, and this kind of post is our way of giving a little back.
Sometimes we overshare—like in our posts about things readers didn’t know about us or our playful “real” series—and it feels good to be open. If you feel like sharing a wise family saying or a piece of advice that stuck with you while growing up, leave it in the comments. My mom always told me to wear nice underwear in case I ended up in the emergency room—advice I regretted not following once (it’s a story involving Care Bears and a 21-year-old me, which I’ll leave to your imagination).
Update – We get frequent questions about professional blogging: how we built the site, grew traffic, and turned it into a full-time job. We’ve shared those details elsewhere for anyone interested in learning more about the business side of blogging.